Countdown to the New Year....Goal Setting Time!

I’m into goal setting and here we are at the cusp of a New Year, it’s time to start afresh! My goal for 2025 is to create more community for those interested in learning about the Enneagram. The first one being EnneaDate starting in January. EnneaDate will be a monthly date night featuring a specific Enneagram Type with the goal of exploring how an individual’s type influences their relationships. Deepening a connection with another through understanding their personality requires intentionality, curiosity and mutual respect. Each of these nights will give priority to a specific EnneaType and together we’ll deepen the connection through learning what makes that type unique, gain understanding to how they are motivated, appreciating their strengths, exploring their values as well as what might be challenging about being in relationship with them. Whether you want to be understood or you hope to understand, this will be a fun atmosphere to participate in. Mark your calendar for the first Type One EnneaDate night January 30. More details to sign up coming soon!

Other offerings will be: In February my colleagues within Enneagram Professionals (a northwest chapter of Enneagram experts) and I will be leading a workshop for Parenting, how understanding one’s Enneagram type can be helpful and hindering to one of the most profound jobs one can have: parenting a kid.

Throughout 2025 I hope to host a myriad of discussion groups and panels with the focus on one EnneaType at a time. I’ve often heard from clients that they want to meet others with their same type, to learn from, compare notes with, and foster greater community. I can’t wait to provide these smaller group experiences for those who want to develop greater self-awareness utilizing this profound system.

As always, I will continue to offer individual Enneagram counseling, guidance, and professional support. I've created more availability in my schedule for those looking to uncover the patterns behind their thoughts and behaviors. It’s deeply fulfilling to help others gain clarity, purpose, and empowerment in their lives.

Be on the look out for upcoming dates and program, hope to see you there!

Showing up in the world via Instinct

If you were to attend my Enneagram 101 class, our first topic of conversation would about be about the Enneagram Subtypes, also known as Instincts, which might be used interchangeably.

Coined Self Preservation, Social, or Sexual/One-to-One, these Instinctual Subytpes are a central aspect of how you show up in the world and are the key biological drives and fundamental values that influence your feelings and actions. You have all three of them within you; one, however, will seem to take precedence in how you express yourself. Knowing this about yourself, gives further understanding of the observable traits that work independently from your Enneagram type. It helps with understanding others and their motivations as well.

To uncover your most prominent Subtype, I might ask you the question:

Where does your attention go throughout a week?

• Are you primarily attending to your material needs and life necessities for security or comfort? That is how a self preservation subtype shows up.

• Are you involved in and enjoy interacting with others towards a common purpose throughout the month? If so, you might be leading with a social subtype.

• Are you making sure you have deeper connections, spending energy towards bonding with special others in your life? A person who has the sexual/one-to-one instinctual drive would focus attention this way.

To further explain, the Subtypes help clarify the variation among people with the same Enneagram type. I can have three Type 6’s sitting in front of me and although they share very common characteristics of Type 6 personality, their dominate instinct makes them function differently from one another. Without getting into the nuanced version of each subtype within a type (making 27 all together—check out B. Chestnut’s book The Complete Enneagram, it’s an excellent resource), let me describe the Instincts briefly.

SELF PRESERVATION

Self Preservation Instinctual Subtypes are preoccupied with getting and maintaining physical safety and personal comfort needs taken care of. They apply their energy towards taking care of their basic life necessities (maintaining a home, paying bills, grocery shopping). These individuals tend to be self sufficient and disciplined, generally putting energy towards being prepared. Words associated with this type might be: self care, comfort, preserving, practical, appetite, ritual, calculating.

SOCIAL

Social Instinctual Subtypes are preoccupied with being accepted and belonging within the social system. They like to feel involved and enjoy interacting with others for a common purpose. These individuals tend to thrive within community and focus on their sense of accomplishment for a greater good. Words associated with this type include: navigating, amongst, cooperating, belonging, systems, participation, everybody.

SEXUAL/ONE-TO-ONE

Sexual (commonly called One-to-One) Instinctual Subtypes are searching for a deeper connection with one other. They focus their attention towards the quality and status of relationships with specific individuals. Their energy tends to go towards the maintenance of bonding to others they have an interpersonal attraction towards. Words associated with this type: transmit, attract, favorite, connect, mutual, between.

Regardless of your Enneagram type, understanding your subtype can illuminate key aspects to where your attention is drawn, what is prioritized throughout the day/week, the habits you exhibit, and how you survive under stress. If you would like help navigating these concepts, please contact Bridge City Enneagram for guidance and conversation. #enneagram #bridgecityenneagram #enneagramsubtypes #enneagraminstincts #selfdiscovery

Willingness to Discover

Being a therapist, I value transformational work. Over the past 12+ years I have studied the Enneagram, a holistic system based on many ancient wisdom traditions combined with modern psychology. For me, it’s a model of personal transformation that leads to a path for growth.

A client asked me the other day why they should look into or utilize the Enneagram. I explained to them the Enneagram presents 9 personality types where each of us may recognize within ourselves behaviors from each type, but there are defining characteristics of one that dominates. The Enneagram is comprehensive and thorough, directing us towards where our attention goes, how we might survive in this world. It’s a system that will help one see how this survival technique corresponds to patterns of thought, emotion and behavior as well as illuminates one’s personal strengths.

For example, I asked them to think about where their attention goes to when they wake up in the morning. Different people start the day with different thoughts or moods. Some wake up filled with energy, goals slated to accomplish before lunch, while others wake up anxious wondering what catastrophic occurrence is bound to happen that day, still there are some that might be filled with angst having gone to sleep feeling disconnected emotionally from their loved one. Each one of our attention is drawn to a habitual pattern of thought and understanding this can influence how we might behave throughout the following day.

As I shared with this client the value of this work, they warmed to the idea that exploring the gifts and challenges they are facing would allow them to not only grow in self-awareness, but have more flexibility in choosing how they interact with those close to them. They became willing to discover, in gentle ways, how their tendencies of relating to the world could be more effective and overall lead to a more grounded, balanced life.

Having a trained guide, professional coach walk with you through this process of self-discovery is invaluable and what I am most passionate about.